One Of Our 50 Is Missing - May 2010

After more than two decades, thousands of our readers have shared their experiences of lost New Mexico in the "One of Our 50 is Missing" humor column, compiled by managing editor Walter K. Lopez. Tell us your experiences at fifty@nmmagazine.com.

PHILLY FIASCO: New Mexico Magazine contributor Doug Fine (“Greener Acres,” facing page) says that a recent trip to Philadelphia brought him an unexpected experience he won’t soon forget. He writes:

“So I’m trying to flee Philadelphia in advance of a big winter storm, it’s crowded with winding security lines, and at the first airport ID station, the woman doing the checking gives me that ‘What the heck is “new” about Mexico?’ look. I see where this is heading when she asks me if I have a passport.

“Why would I?” I ask. “I’m just flying to Albuquerque.” Needless to say, a supervisor is called. I ask him what the issue is—maybe I can help—but this supervisor really doesn’t want any questions from some nosy foreigner. I don’t know if that’s standard operating procedure, or if he just doesn’t want to say, “I’m not sure what this ‘New’ Mexico situation is.” It could be that our newly designed Land of Enchantment licenses are unfamiliar—once it’s again established that I haven’t brought my passport for my intra-U.S. flight, he asks to see, in sequence, my credit cards, my library card, my food co-op membership, my AAA membership, and my healthcare card.

“It seems that saving face carries the day. After my barrage of American-sounding identifying is finished, the supervisor lets me pass through security, sounding as if he regrets it a bit; as if he’s still a little unsure of which nation I am a citizen.”

JOB INSECURITY: Jason Cook, who works as a job recruiter in Atlanta, Georgia, had to take of one his co-workers to task during a recent day at the office.

“I work finding jobs for ex-military candidates,” Cook says, “and recently, a co-worker of mine was excited about having placed a candidate with a job in Anchorage, Alaska.”

“Jason, my next target is New Mexico!” Cook’s friend exclaimed. A little confused, Cook asked him what his point was. “Well, I’ve placed someone in Hawaii, and now Alaska—that just leaves New Mexico.”

Cook says that when he finally realized where his friend was going with all this, he said, “You do realize that New Mexico is contained within the borders of the 48 contiguous United States?”
Deflated, Cook’s friend headed back to his desk. “True . . . good point,” was all he could say in response.

SCREWY DEWEY: Rachel Horwitz, the librarian of McKinley Middle School, in Albuquerque, says she’s always on the lookout for quality books about New Mexico. So when, in a library catalog, she came across the title New Mexico in a series called “Celebrate the States,” she didn’t hesitate to order it.
Horowitz was thrilled when the book arrived, but couldn’t resist a chuckle when she attempted to shelve it.

“I noticed that the [book’s] Dewey classification was wrong,” she says. “It was marked 972, which, as every good librarian knows, is for books on [the history of] Mexico. Books about New Mexico are filed under 978.9.”

She admits that this is a mistake commonly made by booksellers. “While books about New Mexico and Mexico may have the same proper noun in their titles, they are not shelved in the same place. Once again, New Mexico was misplaced.”